If ...

Our lives are filled with many inevitable ifs. For example we tell ourselves “If this has not happened, I would ..... ” or “ If I have done this earlier ..... ”. These sentiments and regrets are parts of our lives.

If we have strong feelings (for example anger, guilt, regret) for a while, it is quite harmless. However, if we dwell on them for weeks , I think such negative feelings are not good for us. We could feel dis-spirited and unhappy or do rash things.

If it is a mistake we have made, then we could try to make remedy and try to ensure such mistake will not happen again. 

One tool you could use when you are upset by such a situation is the proverb 'What is done cannot be undone'. This is a simple tool but also a powerful one. I find it very helpful.